I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
