problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
