let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
