How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
