I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon