So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
