playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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