Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
