I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
