I bet he comes in French.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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