I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
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She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
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How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa