I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on