he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize