So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
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When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
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It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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