Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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