if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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