So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
