Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I need a burrito and a hug.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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