oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize