he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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