WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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