Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
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