so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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