There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
