I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize