Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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