Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
