I can tuck mytits in my pants
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize