i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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