Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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