I want to make a zoo with you.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
