the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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