Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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