My room smells like vodka and shame
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
