I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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