he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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