oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Someone shit on the floor
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Randomize
