Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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