i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I party with great urgency now.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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