Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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