Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I want you more than these girls want KFC
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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