Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Randomize
