K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
