I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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