HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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