Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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