I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
