NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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