Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Sext me about skeletons
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
