my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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