I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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