i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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