is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
